What are your family values? Do you understand the personalities at play within your home and/or business? If your family took off in an RV and how would everyone react to the change?
Everyone is uniquely made and I've learned how important it is to seek understanding. But, I didn't come to that realization on my own!!
When I first got married (and even now), if it weren't for some influential people in my life, I would have made many more mistakes along the way! Mentors, formal or informal, grant us a leg up. They give you that encouragement to take another step toward the unknown. They can do this because they've taken that step, or seen others do it.
Over the years I can give credit to so many lovely mentors in my life, but today I'm going to delve into #8: Family Values & Goals from the series on my 13 most influential decisions over the last 13 years.
When Matt and I were first married we met Jim. He's one of those men everyone connects to. He's a natural friend. If you've met Jim and you don't like him...you're the one with the problem. He's the amazing President at Focal Point Consulting.
One trait that defines his amazingness is his passion for helping others play for the same team. Jim is a conflict/resolution and team development expert. He comes alongside businesses and teams to help them function well. He coaches executives on team development, values & goal setting, and personality interactions, specifically the Myers Briggs typing.
Jim's influence in my life was early on. It was a crucial building block for my marriage and our decision-making style as a family.
Ashley is a recent find for me. I love her passion for helping families thrive in their relationships with one another, moving from chaos and reaction to living a life of intention. She has a teaching spirit and desire to connect others at a foundational level. Her influence in my life has been over the last several months. Ashley is a marriage and family coach, podcaster and blogger at Mama Says Namaste.
She and her family travel the country in an RV and help others connect to their children and say "yes" to adventure. She's a highly skilled personality coach and specializes in family dynamics using the DISC profiling system.
Because we recently set out on our own travel trailer adventures, I've been inspired by Ashley as I think about school and family dynamics. She has hit a sweet spot as she seeks to balance understanding and including her children on their unschooling adventures.
What they share in common:
Both Jim and Ashley are the kinds of people who give away what they've been given. They both care about others and use their talents to serve the world around them.
How Jim's life impacts me:
Before I got married Jim offered to help us define our values as a family. He spent hours with us, asking probing questions, being patient while we brainstormed and helping us formulate our thoughts onto paper.
In the end we came up with these (in no particular order)
- Love for others and family
- Love for the poor, lonely and broken-hearted
I used to think, "Oh that's what everyone would say if asked." But since that time, I've met several families and they've articulated their values to me and they may cross over in a Venn diagram, but mostly they are completely different.
As we look back over the years we've thrived the most when our values are in line with our lifestyle. They shorten the problem solving process or bring light to confusing situations.
How Ashley's life impacts me:
Ashley somehow balances being a nurturing mama without being a helicopter mom. She allows her children freedom and yet, she takes the responsibility of being a parent seriously. Her soul emits love and compassion. I find myself lacking these qualities and so it's always refreshing to read her perspectives on children.
Her focus on the DISC personalities brings insight into why each child/adult responds as they do, what motivates them and helps me understand how they learn most effectively.
Because I'm homeschooling my kids, this has been a game changer. I'm still in the process of working it through, but it's wacked me. All of a sudden I'm noticing dynamics in my kids as they interact with me, my husband and each other.
I'm a learner (as I will be all my life!) and haven't figured it all out yet. But Ashley empowers her community to share with one another, to connect and be real. She's open, receptive and kind. Over the years, I see myself learning more about the DISC profiles (she calls them "Namaste Snapshots") and how to spot moments of teachability in my kids. There's a sweet spot that I'm slowly learning to discern and speak into.
If you'd like to read my informal interview with Ashley you can access that here! To learn more about Ashley and how she can mentor you and your family, consider taking the Namaste Personality Snapshots for your family and see what nuggets you come away with. I'd love to hear your experience with her!
If you're in a business and need coaching, I highly recommend Jim's business. He delivers.
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What about you? What are you values and how have they guided you over the years?
Can you think of a mentor in your life that you can thank this week for their influence in your life? I bet they don't know how they've impacted you, so let them know. It will make their day!